Don't Mess With Texas

You just had to know The Bus was going to be the guy to break my silence.

Faking an injury to avoid getting cut at camp? Are you kidding me? The Bus is releasing a book, and in said book, he claims to have faked the timing of a knee injury to avoid being cut during training camp back in 2000. He had an operation on the knee during the off-season, and went down, writhing in agony during the first play of training camp.

Sure, it was a slimy thing to do, but here’s the real issue: how did the team docs not dig a little deeper and see scar tissue from the procedure? How did they just accept at face value, that a player whose skills were clearly on the decline, was hurt? Makes me wonder.

Another thing that makes me wonder is Stephon Marbury of the New York Knicks. The quotes “from what I hear, dog fighting is a sport,” and “we don't say anything about people who shoot deer or shoot other animals,” are probably going to be my two favourites of the calendar year.

Marbury is one seriously enlightened guy.

I certainly can’t defend game hunting, but at least it requires a license, and doesn’t require doors to be closed. It also doesn’t involve the torture and maiming (and electrocution?!?!?!) of an animal more than 50 million Americans have given names to. Nicely done, Stephon.

Lastly, let’s get to the good stuff. In honour of the 50th anniversary of Major League Baseball’s Gold Glove award, Rawlings released an all-time Gold Glove team Wednesday. Rawlings elected a panel of experts to narrow down the more than 250 Gold Glove winners to a list of 50 players. Those 50 players were put onto a ballot, and fans voted for the all-time team.

I love the whole idea of this list. First off, Cincinnati needs a mall, or a theme park, or something. Of the nine players on the all-time team, three represent the Queen City. Johnny Bench and Joe Morgan were elected to the Hall of Fame as Reds, and Ken Griffey Jr. is a current Red, on his way to Cooperstown.

Second, screw the American League, and their sissy pitchers. This is a list for real men. Of the six Hall of Fame inductees on the list, only one has a bust at Cooperstown wearing an American League cap, Baltimore’s Brooks Robinson.

The three players not elected to the Hall on this list are Greg Maddux, of 16 Gold Glove awards, and bound for the Hall; Griffey, of 10 Gold Gloves despite injuries and a perception his play has fallen off. Also, Hall-of-Fame bound. And lastly, Wes Parker of the 1960s and early 70s Los Angeles Dodgers. Parker isn’t headed to Cooperstown any time soon, and he joins Morgan as the only players on the list with single-digit Gold Glove wins. To be honest, I’ve never even heard of the guy, but the fact he’s on this list means he’s OK in my book.

The incomparable Ozzie Smith rounds out the infield, bringing his 13 Gold Glove awards to the party.

As always, save the best for last. Rounding out the list are Roberto Clemente and Willie Mays.

With four Josh Towerses pitching behind Maddux, this lineup would easily win 120 games (and with Dave Bushes instead of John Towerses, 130 isn’t out of the question).

And to give a little nod to the guys on the other side of the ball, nice work Texas. Way to stamp out any hope of Baltimore posting a 27-run comeback with that 30-3 win Wednesday night. Seriously, no team has posted 30 runs in a Major League game since 1897, that’s 110 years for those of you scoring at home. Also, if you’re scoring at home, let me know if you find a “Don’t mess with Texas” headline anywhere.